Front before pull out:
Managing your money can be easy,
Pull out :
when you can see your goal.
Sub head: Lloyds TSB can help you manage your money and learn to focus on what’s important in life.
Visit lloydstsb.com to learn how to reach your goal.
Front:
Your money can do a lot of things,
Pull out: including grow.
Subhead: See how much money you can grow by opening an account with Lloyds TSB today.
Visit lloydstsb.com to learn how to nurture your money.
Front:
You admire someone who makes money,
Pull out:
and knows how to keep it.
Sub head:
Manage your money wisely with Lloyds TSB and you can earn the respect you deserve.
Visit lloydstsb.com to learn how to earn respect.
TAG: Predict your future.
Can you adjust the front header (before pull out) and the pull out head so they work as two sentences?
ReplyDeleteSubhead is too long. Cut away (i.e. Focus on your future—not managing your money.)
Love the head on #2. Consider replacing the word 'grow' in the sub on #2, as you've already used it in the main head.
Not sure if 'nurture' is the right word for CTA on #2. Feels like that takes an incredibly active role (parents nurture their children = big job; managing your money should be simple)
For #3, can you make it more about them, instead of people they admire (active role versus passive admiration). Think about twisting it (i.e. Be the kind of person who makes money. And knows how to keep it.)
Tag - revisit. Not about predicting. More about making it happen.